The word love is one of our most used words. It may be one of our most confusing ones, too. When a person falls in love with someone, what are they really falling in love with? Are they falling in love with a set of actions and behaviors that they perceive to be characteristic of their lover?
Are they falling in love with an image that their brain has processed as beautiful or handsome? Or do they fall in love with another person’s mind and soul (if there is such a thing)? These questions can lead you down a whole host of roads, each more interesting than the last. In my opinion: it depends on who you ask! There are some people who have strong faith that their loved one falls into category A while others insist that their partner is category B.
In order to answer this question, we must first clarify what love actually is and how it can be distinguished from the attraction. Are they the same thing? Is one more important than the other? How can you tell which is which? True love (the kind that will last a lifetime) requires both elements, but one of them may be more important to you than the other. If you’re in search of your soul mate, here are four tips to help you find true love and avoid falling into common traps along the way.
The line between lust and love can be thin, but there are a few telltale signs to let you know when a crush has morphed into something more. If you have an affection for someone, you might spend your nights dreaming about them or thinking about how to get back in touch with them.
You’ll also likely feel possessive of that person (maybe not physically, but mentally) and want to share all your feelings and thoughts with him or her. With lust, though, it’s more about physical attraction than anything else. Lust is most often characterized by fantasies about someone other than your partner—someone who is unlikely to reciprocate those feelings.
When you’re falling in love, it may seem like you have been possessed by something inexplicable. You can be attracted to many people who don’t give a damn about you, but only one person makes your knees weak at first sight. The way that feeling overpowers your brain is what most of us refer to as love—but if that’s not real affection, then what is it? There are many relationships out there we feel like we’re falling in love with: our best friend, our business partner, or even a celebrity crush. What is real affection versus infatuation? It’s complicated because most people confuse attraction with genuine care for another person.
Liking someone means that you find them physically and intellectually attractive. Being in love is much deeper than just attraction, however. In order to fall in love with someone, you must be willing to let go of your idea of a perfect partner. In other words, it isn’t possible to be in love with someone until you stop placing such high standards on what perfect looks like and instead embrace who your partner actually is.
If you’re dating or in a committed relationship, chances are that over time you’ve experienced infatuation. You know that euphoric feeling when everything is perfect and exciting, and you can’t stop thinking about your partner. That infatuation stage eventually fades but for some people, it doesn’t fade completely.
Instead of becoming a full-blown romantic relationship, what happens is what many experts call a pseudo-relationship: It looks like a real relationship to outsiders, but there isn’t any real love behind it (just attraction). To figure out if you’re truly in love or just experiencing pseudo-love with your partner, take note of these four signs
Many people are quick to say that they know what real love is. This raises an important question: how do you know if your relationship is true love or simply infatuation, lust, and attraction? Instead of looking for easy answers in movies and on television, where every romantic relationship ends happily-ever-after, examine some relationships that haven’t worked out. There may be more than one lesson to learn from each broken heart.
Real love is defined as a strong feeling of deep affection that’s not based on anything materialistic. Real love can be between two people, or it can also be extended to include others, such as friends, family members, and pets. It’s almost always reciprocal; you need to love yourself in order to receive real love from others. Sometimes we don’t feel worthy of it—and then we allow that feeling to lead us away from giving and receiving it. The best thing you can do is remind yourself that you deserve it, whatever it is for you at any given time.